CNN.commentary :)

[skreidle]

Yellowstone snowmobile ban overturned: It would hurt business! (Always more important than environmental and noise pollution.)

Atkins' widow criticizes report of husband's obesity: "Shh! You're not supposed to have that information!"

Microsoft warns of hacker-friendly flaw: Uh-huh.

Swimmer drives for help with shark attached to leg: "There's nothing in our procedure manual for that type of thing!"

Sea lion leaves ocean for 65-mile trip inland: "Maybe he was going after fish, and there are far fewer sea lions to compete with in the delta." True that.

Pornographer to sell Whitehouse.com: Sure, it's to protect your kid from taunting, nothing to do with the new misleading-URL law.

Woman drops Jackson lawsuit: Made her point, she says. Right--that she's a freaking idiot an overly sensitive and repressed git?

China 'won't meddle' with Taiwan: Nope, no meddling, but "Chen cannot conceal his evil intention of using [the referendum] to pave the way for future referendums on Taiwan independence." Eeeevil!

Chocolate sweet for heart, science shows: Huzzah!

Coalition: Diplomas losing meaning: And we're surprised?

France backs head scarf ban: Offensive to some, sure, but 70% of polled French, including over half of the polled French Muslims, support the ban.

Love school: The country's first certification course for matchmakers: Specialists for every niche of every niche.

"Pizzagra": Plans are underway to unveil the world's sexiest ... pizza?: Just when you thought pizza couldn't get any better..